Clouds and silver linings

Wednesday, February 17, 2016

Negativity may knock on your door, but that does not mean you have to let it in.

When I let negativity get to me, especially the kind that is self-inflicted, I notice a feeling of getting stuck in a downward spiral. To avoid falling into this trap, I've taught myself over the years to try my best to find at least one positive thing about any situation I'm in. Indeed, this can be really tough to do when you find yourself amidst a storm with only dark clouds dominating your horizon. But following any slammed door of rejection in your face, another door of opportunity will open.

Finding something to be grateful for in weary situations doesn't mean you're glad the event took place. Instead, it helps you cope with life's unpredictable nature and in letting go. Be careful, however, not to blame everything bad happening to you on life itself. By playing the blame game you're only giving away your power in making choices as a rational human being. 

Dwelling on the negative simply contributes to its power. - Shirley MacLaine

I'm definitely not saying that everything in your life is a (direct) consequence of past choices you've made, à la 'The Secret'. How in earth could you attribute every traumatic event like abuse or sickness (completely) to the doings of a person? No one asks or wishes for bad things to happen to them, although I do believe negative thoughts can be very powerful in shaping upcoming events. But aside frome external factors beyond our control, there's one thing you generally have a great say in: your attitude. 

When something bad happens you have three choices. You can let it define you, let it destroy you, or you can let it strengthen you.

So, the other day when I accidentally misinterpreted the time a theater movie would start, thinking for some reason that it would start at 19.15 instead of 18.45, I could've let it ruin my evening. After all, we were looking forward to see it, the tickets were already paid for, and we were armed with refreshments. Yup, that did hurt my wallet. And my initial reaction was irritation and looking for something to blame my oversight on. Of course I could come up with numerous reasons to turn the attention away from me, so I would feel less bad about myself. But then I remembered reading about taking responsibility in life instead of blaming others in order to live a happy life.

Sui kau soup, black pepper & salt squid, and stuffed eggplant w/ fish at New King for lunch

Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck. - Dalai Lama

I found the unexpected cloud's silver lining, by noting that missing the movie created the opportunity to watch a different movie, at home, nice and cosy, ánd comfortably warm, on the couch. Getting home early, thus going to bed on time (which did not happen, but still hehe). Eating fries and drinking wine. And in the end, acknowledging that I had a great day nonetheless. Being grateful for the wonderful lunch I had and for a productive day at college. And last but not least, I had cake that afternoon. Chocolate salted caramel fudge cake at Betty Blue's. Not the best cake I've had in this lifetime, but cake nonetheless. That's enough reason for a celebration imo.

Chocolate salted caramel fudge cake at Betty Blue
Very decadent, but the texture was a bit too firm for my liking 
♡♡♡ out of 5 hearts

Red velvet cake at Betty Blue
Very moist and tasty! Although it's not nice of me to compare, I liked this one way better than De Drie Graefjes', whose cake has become very dry over the years
♡♡♡♡ out of 5 hearts

Keep your head up no matter what and don't let life get to you!


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